Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
