DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Randomize
