he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
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