Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
