he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
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