I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
