Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
