Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
