Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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