you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
