Rock
Scissors
Fuck
you guys were way drunker than both of me
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
