I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
So gin and wine won't be happening again
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Randomize
