I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
