so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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