Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
well you can't waste a boner
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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