We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
handjob tips. give me some.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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