I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
are you so shy because you have an std?
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
