Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
