I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize
