There is no way he is gay with that hair.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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