can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
