i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
