Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
