what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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