By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
