$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Randomize
