i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Randomize
