Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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