Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
