The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
