Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
