My room smells like vodka and shame
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
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