come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
