He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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