i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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