Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
