Midget sex pt 2 tonight
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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