I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
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