apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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