i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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