I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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