it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
