can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
