somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
