Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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