i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
