i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
