whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
