she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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