Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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